We, with Our Benefits
by HappyBlushCalayapie
Summary: It all started with an innocent girl girl asking Tamaki if he was a virgin... it ALL went downhill from there. Lemons, MoriXHoney, KyoTama, HikaKao twincest, Hitachiincest and eventual straight pairings involving Haruhi.
1. Chapter 1

Title: We, with Our Benefits…

Anime: Ouran High School Host Club

Pairing: (Depends on the chapter)

Chapter 1: Non-Virgin Hosts

"So, Tamaki…" one of his guests asked, "Are you a virgin?" she blushed. His entire face turned red as a cherry.

"Kaorin! You don't just ask somebody that! Especially Tamaki!" one of the other girls said. The others nearby that overheard nodded in agreement.

"D-d-define ivirgin/i…" he replied, still blushing, but adverting their eyes. The girls blushed even more, and then squealed.

"He's so innocent and cute! Kyaa!" they said.

"Hey, isn't the innocent title used only for me?" Honey asked, passing by holding his pink rabbit Usa-chan. He stopped nearby Tamaki. "And they asked you a super embarrassing question!" he said, smiling widely. "So…" he leaned on the side of the couch, looking up at him. "Tama… what ikind/i of virgin?" he turned bright red again in reply. The girls giggled, blushing brightly, never having seen this side of Honey before. He whispered to Tamaki, knowing that the other girls at the table could hear, "That's for trying to be the innocent one." He winked and walked away.

"Ahh… good grief." He said. The girls continued to giggle.

"Besides…" Honey said, looking other his shoulder cutely. "I can always say that I've lost mine, and all the attention will go to me!"

"EHHHHHHH?!" all the girls in the room yelled. They rushed over to him.

"No, no, NO! You're too small and cute, and young!" one of the girls said.

"I'm seventeen, so why not?" he asked innocently.

"It's… it seems like it'd be a sin, for you!" another one said.

"Oh? Takashi, is it a sin that I'm not a virgin?"

"Consider the type of virgin you are, and don't say a word about it." He answered, not looking at him.

"Is… Mori ialso/i...?" one of the girls asked.

"Uh-huh! Neither of us are virgins." The lolishota replied.

"What do you mean by 'type' of virgin?" another girl asked.

"Oh, that's a secret. Right Takashi?"

"Mm." he replied, drinking some tea so that his reply was muffled. This conversation ended up at the twins' table.

"Um…" the girls said, blushing and looking at their laps. "You are…?"

"Absolutely, positively cherry-less!" they chorused.

"Naughty boys!" Tamaki yelled, glaring at them. "Don't use dirty language around young girls!"

"Aww, but we're all in high school. Why not?" they asked.

"Kyoya—" a girl passing by asked.

"No cherry." He answered calmly, continuing his work at his computer.

"Mommy! You too?!"

"Sorry iDaddy/i. And you already know your answer to the girls. We're all virgins… it just depends on how you look at it."

"Tamaki… what does it mean?" a girl asked, leaning forward, anticipating his answer.

"W-well… that's a secret. A secret between hosts and friends."

"Can we be friends?" the girls begged.

"As in, the hosts that are friends. A secret between us boys. I'm sorry, ladies."

"Aww…" they said, whimpering.

"Oh! B-but don't cry! You ladies are the lights in my life. There will always be a place for you, my sweet, sweet angels." The girls looked at him adoringly and swooned. He had it back under control with his guests. He glared at Kyoya for saying that. What if the girls guessed? What if they understood it somehow?

"S-so… who'd you lose your virginity to?" a girl asked the twins. They both looked at each other, smirked a little bit, and looked back at the girls.

"It's a secret." They said. The girls blushed deeply, looking surprised.

"They didn't…" one said.

"They did!" another said, smiling widely. All of the girls squealed loudly.

"Ah, ladies…" Kaoru whispered to his older brother.

"Let them think about it as much as they want to. I'm putting a cherry on top of this sundae. They'll request us for isure/i next week." Hikaru whispered back before hissing Kaoru's hand. The girls fainted, and some of them nose-bled before doing so.

"Hikaru…" Kaoru said cutely.

"Tamaki?" a familiar voice said. The king nearly had a heart attack.

"H-Haruhi! Don't sneak up on Daddy like that…" he placed his hand over his heart and sighed dramatically.

"What's all this commotion about? I come back, and some of our guests look like they've died…" she said, referring to the many emotionally and mentally destroyed guests at Honey and Mori's table, and the passed out and overly-pleased guests at the Hitachiin twins' table.

"Oh-ho-ho-ho! Oh-ho-ho-ho!" they heard the sound of a powerful motor.

"Oh no, not Renge at a time like this!" Tamaki said as the motor stopped making her rise.

"How rude of you, Tamaki! You and the other impure boys may not be virgins, but iI/i saw how you all ilost/i them because you're naughty boys that did it in this very abandoned music room!"

"biEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!/i/b" all the girls screamed. Many girls were talking loudly to each other, and it had become quite a scene.

"Where did you get an orgasm?!" one of the girls asked enthusiastically to the poor, blonde, surprised king. He backed away from the girl slowly. He turned and looked at Haruhi, who was looking at him funny.

"H-H-Haruhi…" he said, not sure what else to add.

"But I'm sure that I'm not the only pure one. Am I right, Haruhi?" Renge said.

"H-HUH?!" she said in surprise.

"You're a virgin, are you not?" she smiled smugly, pointing at the brunette, who unbeknownst to her was female, like her.

"I-I am! I'm a virgin!" she yelled, very startled by the question.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki said, very pleased and looking at her with big, sparkly blue eyes.

"We can be virgins together!" Renge said to Haruhi, happy, oh-so happy.

'OH, GOD, SHE'S GONNA DEVIRGINIZE HARUHI!' the twins and Tamaki thought in horror. They saw Renge disappearing under the floor again and let her go, glad that Haruhi hadn't gone with her. They sighed, relieved. Kyoya stood up and said,

"Everyone, attention, please. I would like to have a word with you. We are closing up shop early, today, and none of the things that were just said are to leave this room. Those were very personal questions you girls asked. I have spies at this school, and all over the country. If you reveal any of the information you have just heard in this Host Club, you will be banned from returning."

"Ehh?!" many girls said.

"No way!" others said.

"You may go home, now." The raven-haired boy finished with a smile. The girls left reluctantly, muttering to themselves and each other about how unfair it was.

Later on, when Honey and Mori were headed home in their limo, Honey whispered,

"None of the girls ever have to know how, why, or what happened." He hugged Mori. "Takashi, keep me safe and warm tonight."

"Mitsukuni…" he hugged the small boy back, knowing that they had to keep the Host Club's secret. After all… it was only Hosts with Benefits. What could possibly go wrong?

Title: We, with Our Benefits…

Anime: Ouran High School Host Club

Pairing: (Depends on the chapter)

Chapter 2: Host Pairing's Good Night Part 1—KyoTama, MoriHoney, HikaKao

"Kyoya…" Tamaki said. It was nighttime, and they were in an old tree house, an unexpected place for two aristocratic teenagers to be. He pushed Tamaki against one of the wooden walls.

"It's been a long time since anyone's come to the 'Extra Club'. We ireally/i should fix this place up." The look on Kyoya's face, and the lust in his eyes said otherwise. That wasn't so much on his mind as what this club was iused/i for, was. The blonde sighed.

"I'm not in the mood. My daughter's angry at me, Mommy. Did you see how she was looking at me?"

"Well, iDaddy/i, quite frankly, you're inever/i in the mood anymore, which is why this place got into such bad shape. We never come here anymore." Tamaki looked away from him.

"I guess any child wouldn't want to know about what their Dad does at night with their Mom..." Kyoya tilted Tamaki's chin so that he would look at him. He gently rubbed his lower lip with his thumb, and leaned in closer, pressing his knee between his legs to further trap him.

"This Extra Club ended up being invented for a reason. Do you need to be reminded of what that reason iis/i?" the raven haired boy asked. Receiving no answer, he continued. "We were all sexually frustrated. The twins have sex with each other. Mori and Honey have sex with each other. iWe/i have sex with each other. Do you know when this started?"

"Um…"

"It started when that girl came into the Host Club and put everyone under her spell."

"Haruhi?" Tamaki said, surprised.

"Yes. Haruhi."

"Don't talk about my daughter that way—!" he was cut off by the glassing wearing male's lips pressed against his own, hungrily kissing him. He tried to push him off, not in the mood for this sort of thing, but found that it was impossible. Kyoya grabbed his good arm and made it stay pressed against the wall above his head. He slipped his tongue into the king's mouth, and Tamaki's blue eyes lowered, then shut, as his own warm, wet muscle met Kyoya's and engaged in battle.

"Takashi! I can't find my clothes!" Honey said. They were in his room, all alone. The little blonde boy had just gotten out of the shower, and was warm, clean, and smelled like sweet strawberries. The tall, stoic teen put down the textbook his was reading for study-purposes, and looked at Honey.

"Mitsukuni… you could cover yourself, instead of walking around like that." He said, blushing, but not much. He remained calm.

"Why? You've seen my naked, before." He walked over to the bed, stepped onto it between Mori's legs, leaned down and kissed him fearlessly for a few seconds. "Besides…" he said once he broke the kiss. "I was thinking that it would be fun to remember how we lost our virginity." He looked into his dark brown eyes passionately. Honey was the type who liked to dive right into things and believe in the one he was with. He had only been with Mori, so far, and Mori was gentle. He was big when aroused, but made it feel like it was right, and perfect-sized for Honey, who was still growing.

"Is this really okay?" the tall boy asked.

"It's fine. It's definitely, definitely fine." He leaned in to kiss him again.

Kaoru gasped as he hit the bed. His brother wanted to play rough tonight. His gasp was cut off by Hikaru pressing his lips ihard/i against his younger brother's, slipping his tongue in the open mouth and exploring it as though he owned the place. His fingers were tangled in his messed up hair, and Kaoru wrapped his arms around him, deepening the kiss.

"Damn…" Kyoya said. I wanted to use a toy or two on you tonight, but it seems that Hikaru and Kaoru have made off with them.

"Oh…" Tamaki said, his mind clouded with lust from all of the kisses and teasing he had received from 'Mommy'. He had completely forgotten about Haruhi. Naturally, that was the Shadow King's plan from the start.

"Whatever." He was quick to re-pin the blonde, and he reached down to unzip his pants. "I don't need toys to get you off." He said smugly.

"Hikaru… you took the vibrator, again…" Kaoru said, blushing.

"And I have the ultimate lube, too." Hikaru said. "This is gonna be ifun/i. Wish I'd brought the collar with me…"

"No. Never again. After the last time, I never want to experience that, again." Kaoru said defiantly.

"Aw, you're no fun. You're a real slut with that thing on." He started heatedly kissing him again before removing his underwear as he did so.

"Takashi… I've always wanted to know what this does." He extended his hand and showed the tall boy the collar. Mori gasped. He knew what it did. It injects pheromones into the blood stream so that the catcher, or the female in the relationship, goes into temporary heat for the first person they see in the room. Mori slowly took the collar away from him.

"This had Kaoru going crazy for a week. It has bad side affects. Mitsukuni, I don't want you to end up hurting because of this." He opened a drawer and placed it inside.

"Aw… that's no fun. I wanted to experience the fun pleasure that those two get…"

"Those two play rough. I'm much taller than you, so if you started giving off those pheromones, I would end up going overboard."

"If I get the injection, I won't icare/i if you go overboard! Please, Takashi!"

"No." he said firmly. He was given big puppy dog eyes in reply to his response. "Maybe when you're eighteen and a little bit taller, then…"

"Yay! Takashi, you're the greatest!" he hopped into his lap and reached down low. "Until then… I know what we'll be doing tonight." He said seductively.

bTen comments, and I'll do the next chapter with lemons for all three of these pairings!/b


	2. Chapter 2

Title: We, with Our Benefits…  
Anime: Ouran High School Host Club  
Pairing: (Depends on the chapter)  
Chapter 2: Host Pairing's Good Night Part 1—KyoTama, MoriHoney, HikaKao

"Kyoya…" Tamaki said. It was nighttime, and they were in an old tree house, an unexpected place for two aristocratic teenagers to be. He pushed Tamaki against one of the wooden walls.

"It's been a long time since anyone's come to the 'Extra Club'. We _really_ should fix this place up." The look on Kyoya's face, and the lust in his eyes said otherwise. That wasn't so much on his mind as what this club was _used_ for, was. The blonde sighed.

"I'm not in the mood. My daughter's angry at me, Mommy. Did you see how she was looking at me?"

"Well, _Daddy_, quite frankly, you're _never_ in the mood anymore, which is why this place got into such bad shape. We never come here anymore." Tamaki looked away from him.

"I guess any child wouldn't want to know about what their Dad does at night with their Mom..." Kyoya tilted Tamaki's chin so that he would look at him. He gently rubbed his lower lip with his thumb, and leaned in closer, pressing his knee between his legs to further trap him.

"This Extra Club ended up being invented for a reason. Do you need to be reminded of what that reason _is_?" the raven haired boy asked. Receiving no answer, he continued. "We were all sexually frustrated. The twins have sex with each other. Mori and Honey have sex with each other. _We_ have sex with each other. Do you know when this started?"

"Um…"

"It started when that girl came into the Host Club and put everyone under her spell."

"Haruhi?" Tamaki said, surprised.

"Yes. Haruhi."

"Don't talk about my daughter that way—!" he was cut off by the glassing wearing male's lips pressed against his own, hungrily kissing him. He tried to push him off, not in the mood for this sort of thing, but found that it was impossible. Kyoya grabbed his good arm and made it stay pressed against the wall above his head. He slipped his tongue into the king's mouth, and Tamaki's blue eyes lowered, then shut, as his own warm, wet muscle met Kyoya's and engaged in battle.

-

"Takashi! I can't find my clothes!" Honey said. They were in his room, all alone. The little blonde boy had just gotten out of the shower, and was warm, clean, and smelled like sweet strawberries. The tall, stoic teen put down the textbook his was reading for study-purposes, and looked at Honey.

"Mitsukuni… you could cover yourself, instead of walking around like that." He said, blushing, but not much. He remained calm.

"Why? You've seen my naked, before." He walked over to the bed, stepped onto it between Mori's legs, leaned down and kissed him fearlessly for a few seconds. "Besides…" he said once he broke the kiss. "I was thinking that it would be fun to remember how we lost our virginity." He looked into his dark brown eyes passionately. Honey was the type who liked to dive right into things and believe in the one he was with. He had only been with Mori, so far, and Mori was gentle. He was big when aroused, but made it feel like it was right, and perfect-sized for Honey, who was still growing.

"Is this really okay?" the tall boy asked.

"It's fine. It's definitely, definitely fine." He leaned in to kiss him again.

-

Kaoru gasped as he hit the bed. His brother wanted to play rough tonight. His gasp was cut off by Hikaru pressing his lips _hard_ against his younger brother's, slipping his tongue in the open mouth and exploring it as though he owned the place. His fingers were tangled in his messed up hair, and Kaoru wrapped his arms around him, deepening the kiss.

-

"Damn…" Kyoya said. I wanted to use a toy or two on you tonight, but it seems that Hikaru and Kaoru have made off with them.

"Oh…" Tamaki said, his mind clouded with lust from all of the kisses and teasing he had received from 'Mommy'. He had completely forgotten about Haruhi. Naturally, that was the Shadow King's plan from the start.

"Whatever." He was quick to re-pin the blonde, and he reached down to unzip his pants. "I don't need toys to get you off." He said smugly.

-

"Hikaru… you took the vibrator, again…" Kaoru said, blushing.

"And I have the ultimate lube, too." Hikaru said. "This is gonna be _fun_. Wish I'd brought the collar with me…"

"No. Never again. After the last time, I never want to experience that, again." Kaoru said defiantly.

"Aw, you're no fun. You're a real slut with that thing on." He started heatedly kissing him again before removing his underwear as he did so.

-

"Takashi… I've always wanted to know what this does." He extended his hand and showed the tall boy the collar. Mori gasped. He knew what it did. It injects pheromones into the blood stream so that the catcher, or the female in the relationship, goes into temporary heat for the first person they see in the room. Mori slowly took the collar away from him.

"This had Kaoru going crazy for a week. It has bad side affects. Mitsukuni, I don't want you to end up hurting because of this." He opened a drawer and placed it inside.

"Aw… that's no fun. I wanted to experience the fun pleasure that those two get…"

"Those two play rough. I'm much taller than you, so if you started giving off those pheromones, I would end up going overboard."

"If I get the injection, I won't _care_ if you go overboard! Please, Takashi!"

"No." he said firmly. He was given big puppy dog eyes in reply to his response. "Maybe when you're eighteen and a little bit taller, then…"

"Yay! Takashi, you're the greatest!" he hopped into his lap and reached down low. "Until then… I know what we'll be doing tonight." He said seductively.

**Ten comments, and I'll do the next chapter with lemons for all three of these pairings!**


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